Dr. Darlene Treese
PO Box 547
Windermere, FL 34786
(480) 296-3358

New Office Address
2295 S. Hiawassee Rd,
Suite 309
Orlando, FL 32835
Phone: 407-278-1598 Fax:407-203-0803

Dr. Dar's Weekly News You Can Use:

Distorted Thinking That We All Do When We're Not At Our Best - "Blaming"

This distorted thinking pattern is very common because it's so much of a relief to know who's to blame. If you are suffering, the surely someone is responsible. If you are lonely, hurt, or frightened, then someone else must have caused it. If you are angry, "they" should not have acted the way they did, read your mind for what you wanted and responded accordingly.

Blaming often makes someone responsible for choices and decisions that are actually your responsibility. In this way, someone is always "doing it to you" and you have no responsibility to assert your needs or to say no or go elsewhere for what you want. It makes you a victim in almost every relationship.

Sometimes people focus excessive blame on themselves. They beat themselves up constantly for being incompetent, stupid, too emotional or whatever the situation calls for. They are always ready to be wrong. In staying in the mind set of blame, no positive action is taken to remedy the situation and the self deprecation erodes self esteem to the point of depression and inaction.

What area of your life or what current or past situation may be causing you angst because you are excessively blaming yourself or others? What is another way to look at it?

Next Week: Distorted Thinking - Always Being Right